


cookie thief

by vena_cava



Series: obey me r/chonkers [5]
Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Other, Weight Gain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:34:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27888367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vena_cava/pseuds/vena_cava
Summary: mammon likes to be the cookie king but uhhh the cookie king without anybody else knowing abt the cookies
Relationships: Mammon (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Reader
Series: obey me r/chonkers [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1824040
Comments: 7
Kudos: 36





	cookie thief

**Author's Note:**

> aka fatass steals shit because hes so dramatically in love with you

He didn't know when it started, but he definitely knew why. Anything you'd touched, he wanted and NOBODY but him could have it. It had started with small things like with forks you'd touch or your pencils. But easily it had escalated to things like the fanficful comb Asmo had gifted you, the gaming console that Levi had let you borrow since it wasn't the Ruri-chan limited edition one that he wanted, anything he could get his hands on that you'd touched before. You were his annoying little human, so it was only natural. 

And yet you still wouldn't notice. Wouldn't notice how he worked so hard to hoard your things, nor how he struggled to keep those pilfered trinkets a surprise for you because every. single. TIME. you'd come back with something far prettier and far more expensive (as courtesy of Asmo) than what Mammon had stolen. He couldn't even return it to you then because Asmo would just through out the ratty old thing and buy you a newer one! The tragedy of being Mammon, I tell you. Luckily for him, you were a generous someone who received lots and lots of gifts, so it was only natural to give lots and lots back. The easiest way to give back was in the form of food and that was where Mammon would have a perfect scapegoat. 

In fact, you had so many gifts graciously presented by those horribly attention seeking brothers of his that you had simply thrown individual presents out the window almost entirely. Instead you opted to make dinner every weekend, not letting anyone talk you out of it even if it seemed foolish to even try and sate Beel of all demons. You were a bit hardheaded like that. But that's what made you all the more lovable. Mammon loved how giving you were. It made him want to take everything you handed out, whether it was meant for him or not (he did, sooner or later). 

You had a lot you needed to make. Beel was effectively bottomless, so you overcompensated on purpose. The brothers, Lucifer or Satan usually, and occasionally Barbatos or Solomon or Luke would go ingredients shopping with you. Mammon had tried the first couple of times but had distracted you so badly that you had to blow your Grimm on insane amounts of takeout. So Mammon was banned from shopping with you, at least on weekends. But he was fine with it. You promised that that way, whatever you were making would be a surprise. He wouldn't have admitted that it made him excited, but it did.

He wouldn't ruin your surprise for him, no matter how badly he wanted to know, but that wouldn't stop him from sneaking into the kitchen to see if you had anything else he could steal. The extra treats you'd leave on the counter were obviously not for the brothers until after dinner, but when had Mammon ever let rules stop him? He'd pilfer them and sneak them into his room. You'd been blaming the missing treats on Beel since he was a prime suspect all things considered, but you did find it strange how you never HEARD Beel. He wasn't very good at sneaking, unlike Belphie. This had you scratching your head for a while, so you decided to do a little sneaking yourself.

You had set up this trap completely by yourself, with the help of a few of Satan's Anti-Lucifer gadgets (you would've asked Levi but a Sucre Frenzy based vidcam wasn't exactly subtle. You camped out in Satan's room, watching through the cursed vidcam, hoping to catch the little sneakthief (you had asked about the curse and Satan had assured you it wouldn't work on anyone but Lucifer). You'd set up a saran wrapped plate of cupcakes, decorated via courtesy of Barbatos and his bad ass cake decorating skills. It took a while but eventually a light haired head poked its way into the kitchen. Satan looked over your shoulder when you gasped with delight, a thin blonde eyebrow raising.

"Mammon?" You couldn't help from giggling. Even through the feed of the cam, you could tell that his face was rounder, his cute little pout fuller. When he fully entered the kitchen, he looked like a mischievous raccoon. Satan watched you giggle and squirm like a madman, a bit astounded but not surprised (he'd lived with Asmo his entire life, he was used to 'boy crazy"). He glanced from the feed back to you, shrugging. "Well, now that you know who it is, what's your verdict?" You couldn't tear your eyes from the feed, watching the small pooch of fat form over the hem of his tight jeans as his shirt hiked up. You stopped chewing on the skin around your thumbnail to let yourself speak, Satan rolling his eyes at your answer.

"Make double the amount, of course!"

**Author's Note:**

> a bit on the short end bc i don't rlly like mammon but im doing it for you guys!!! FOR YOU!!


End file.
